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Siblings and Friends - Suzane Northrop

Siblings and Friends

Siblings and Friends

Welcome to August! As astrology buffs know, the majority of August is ruled by Leo, and currently Jupiter is in Leo, giving us a double jolt of energy. This should be most welcomed by many because as I have been hearing from friends and acquaintances, it’s been a difficult period especially for Leo’s. So now is the time to enjoy! What is summer for but to have a little fun! All work and no play, and all that.

In my work, I have noticed that sibling relationships are so very important. They can go a long way toward creating a positive effect in times of trouble and stress, or go to the other extreme if there are conflicts, especially with regard to parents who are in need, or pass away.

As I was pondering the siblings dynamic and starting to write about it, I learned that August 1 was National Girlfriends Day. This really rang a bell because when I am doing readings, I feel that a sister has passed when it is in fact a best girlfriend who has crossed over.

As we all know, for many women, girlfriends can be like sisters. A group of girlfriends I read about come from miles around to meet once a month and share about their marriages, children, parenting, job changes, death of loved ones, illnesses, etc. Through the article, you could feel the love between these girlfriends, and see how their meetings and pot-luck dinners gave each of them a heartfelt experience so needed when going through life. There is no question that this kind of connection is so very important for many women.

So within days of reading the article and wanting to write about siblings, voila, I had a session with three sisters whose mother had passed away. As the mother came through loud and clear, it was obvious that these sisters had remained very connected even though they lived so far apart. And their love of each other continued after their mother’s passing. There was no bickering or fighting over money, property, or other things. Keeping the love bond and remaining respectful of each other like this, is a wonderful way to honor the memory of a parent who has passed, while remaining true to the parent’s wishes.

This month, while visiting my own mother, I learned that our 86 year old neighbor whom we have known for over 30 years had lost his wife of 35 years. All six of her children by a previous marriage were already fighting over every conceivable thing, and totally disregarding their step-dad. The siblings were deciding on their own how their mother should be buried where, who should pay, who would get all the stuffed animals amassed in the house, etc., etc. My heart truly went out to my neighbor. No surviving spouse should have to contend with this type of conflict, or left out of the decision making process.

I had another session with a couple that came to me. The wife had just loss her mom and her brother was deeply upset for not being there, even though he had the most legitimate of reasons: he had been caring for his dying wife 4,000 miles away. The sister wanted him to know that their mother wanted nothing more than for him to be where he needed to be. Thankfully another brother stepped up to help his sister with their mom. Kudos to these three siblings for being so supportive of each other while honoring their widowed mother who had been able to live in her own home and lead a quality life until it was time for her to make the transition. Too often, as I and am sure you have seen, the chore of caring for an aging parent often falls on one sibling, while the others abdicate their responsibility.

These sibling scenarios serve as testament to how things play out in the grand scheme of life. All part of the challenges that — if we handle them correctly — make us stronger. Of course, we often have to dig deep to succeed, but we grow spiritually in the process, and that is its own reward.

I hope to come back to this theme of siblings since I have just tapped the surface here. Interestingly enough, I very often have siblings who come together for a session. I am always fascinated by how siblings can be so different, even though they were brought up in the same household. It for me is always a touching experience when siblings want to share in the experience of connecting with a parent who has crossed over.

In closing, I want to send out loving thoughts to my dear friend Richie who made his transition this month. Truly a beautiful soul who touched many a life.

Enjoy the rest of summer, and if you have a brother or sister, take a moment to reminisce about childhood and go find a sandbox to play in!

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Due to popular demand, we’re bringing back the monthly Ask Suzane column! Here, you have the chance to submit questions directly to Suzane to answer. We may also choose yours to be read/featured in her monthly podcast, Dead Peoples’ Society!

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